I’m Retired. I Don’t Want My Children to Care for Me When I Grow Old.

As my wife and I age, we need more help in the house every year.

Recently, our children have had meetings to talk about us and our long -term care options.

I have been practicing the law on seniors for twenty years and I told them that, according to my experience, the family's eldest girl generally takes over the management of care for parental elders. My children were not impressed. They think that my knowledge is old and has exceeded its shelf life.

There will not be much to do for our family as they get older. When our house becomes too much work for us, we intend to convert it into species and whip the road to assist life.

After the move, people who know how to cook, clean and mowing the lawn will do these things and will be paid for a salary just for their efforts.

In my law office, I saw too many disasters created by family members doing amateur care at the elder's home. When the time comes, I will try my luck with paid professionals.

In my profession, I saw that family care can exacerbate the very problems that he tries to solve

When I practiced the law, I had to regularly explain to families that love and affection are bad substitutes for vocational training, pay checks, days of leave and the appropriate equipment that you receive in care for the elderly.

Family members can provide care for a while, but the day will come when love can be insufficient. Then, if they do not put the work to professionals, exhaustion could possibly bring down the caregiver, with the parent.

Once, family members came to see me to discuss an aging parent who was on the guard of another family member.

The person had spent a few years living with the family's aging member and using the income of the elderly like theirs.

The health needs of the elderly family member increased and the caregiver was exceeded. However, they kept the elderly member of the family at home because they did not want to risk losing both their accommodation and their income.

The other members of the family came to see me to establish a guardianship and move their member of the elderly family in a safe place.

Experience has moved them away.

Families think it won't happen to them, but it could.

I have well -intentioned children, but I plan to live my last years in residential care

When our children raise the question of our plans so that we can no longer maintain the family home, my wife and I are not quickly assured that they are neither expected nor welcome to assume the role of caregiver for us.

We remind them that they are so old. We are at the end of the 1970s and they are in their fifties. We want them to finish these final years and the most profitable in their careers and have a retirement, as we have done, without the stress of taking care of a sick parent.

I practiced the law on elders long enough to have seen negligent and insensitive long -term care establishments, but I will try my luck.

My family can show that they care to visit me, to listen to me to complain about my ills and to laugh again to this story that I have told a hundred times. Physical work, however, will be done by people who know what they are doing and will be paid for this.

Do you have a story to share on the way you live in the retirement? Contact the publisher, Charissa Cheong, at ccheong@businessinsider.com